geeking out on shakespeare's histories

Title: Fail Trying
Author: gileonnen
Play: 1 and 2 Henry IV, Merry Wives of Windsor
Recipient: gehayi
Characters: Falstaff, Doll Tearsheet, Mistress Quickly, Hal, Poins, Mistress and Master Page, Fenton, brief mentions of Hotspur, Kate, and Shallow
Warnings: Foul language, references to prostitution and sex droids, characters expressing misogynistic and fat-bashing attitudes and using ableist language
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Jack Falstaff is a space pirate--but not a particularly good one.
Notes: I have taken some liberties with the prompt in order to keep the worldbuilding internally consistent; I hope that this will be acceptable.

( Fail Trying )